Caryl Wyatt's story

I am Caryl Wyatt, a middle-aged woman from the Northern Suburbs of Johannesburg. In the past, I have spoken publicly about my struggle with bulimia and I am no newcomer to the therapeutic power contained in the interaction between speaker and listeners.

It is this knowledge that inspired me to gather the courage and break silence about the violently abusive marriage I was trapped in for 15 years.

I had been beaten up many times. I had broken bones, blue eyes, split lips, grazed flesh, many “visits” to the hospital, to the lawyers, to the police station, isolation and treatment for depression - and still I would go back for more!

Through my own life experience I have become painfully aware of the fact that there are sadly many, many more women caught up in this macabre dance than we care to admit. They are rendered powerless by an awful paradox - they are afraid to loose their “security”; and at the same time it is their provider that threatens their lives.
I have also come to realize that neither the educated doctors who have attended to my injuries over the years, nor the divorce attorneys, seem to understand the nature of this beast. These professionals are the ones that women like me reach out to.

My quest for a “cure” lead me to do much research on the subject and brought me to the ironic realization that you alone can do it, but you cannot do it alone.
In September 2006 I launched the Abuse is no Excuse campaign with my website, www.abusenoexcuse.co.za. The site is intended to support, educate and give hope to women who are trapped in abusive relationships. It contains a message forum for users to communicate with each other, and several links to other relevant sites. My own story is posted on the site as Carleedancer and my book LOOK ME IN THE EYE is available both in Exclusive book stores around the country and on the website.

Other services that I offer in this regard are:

Public Speaking:

I make myself available to tell my story to as many audiences as possible, in the effort to remove the culturally induced stigma of domestic violence and abusive relationships amongst the middle to upper income group. It’s not a shame – it is a mistake. Denial is the real killer in the end. In the corporate world, the subject is ‘ Coping with domestic turmoil when talking to working people’.

Therapeutic Journaling Workshops:

As part of my own recovery process, I learnt the skill of creating mental and emotional health through journaling. I offer workshops to teach participants a creative way of responding to their given situations. These workshops are also available to Corporate and have great value in helping people to become more aware of them selves and achieve balance in both their personal and professional lives. We all know about goal setting and visualization but few people know the value of journaling and how it can help us make all our dreams a reality.


For more information, please contact Caryl. caryl@abuseisnoexcuse.co.za